Bossy’s Celebrity Crush

In June of 2017, my husband bought us tickets to go see……Red Hot Chilli Peppers.  A true lover of music, my husband frequently declares that our future purchases should be spent on experiences – concerts being likely his top favourite experience.  Having a vague memory of enjoying Red Hot Chilli Peppers in the early 90s when dancing with boyfriend John Seibert at the graduation dance (as he attempted to unzip my dress…but that’s another story) to Under The Bridge, it seemed like a good sounding night.

Now full disclosure needed on two points: 1. I struggle with ageism.  I have never seen the appeal of dating or hooking up with someone eons older than you are.  I had to be gently reminded that my celebrity crush was actually only 10 years older.  I also struggle with denial about my own birth certificate age vs “believed age”, a mental mantra that I’m Forever 21 (or Forever 20.5 if I’m infringing on trademark).

And 2 – I have never had an undying need to hook up with a stranger, even a quote-unquote celebrity stranger. Perhaps the scenario hasn’t presented itself enough for me to accurately know.

I think the night of the concert, the universe was cosmically aligning for me to have some shake ups.

When Anthony Kiedis hit the stage, I was hooked.  Any preconceived notions I had about being attracted to people a lot older than me – gone.  Any preconceived notions about whipping my bra off to present as an offering, is just not me – gone (as was my bra).

The man had me at “I know, I know for sure…”. 

Now my husband was delightfully oblivious as I planned my escape route to the back stage and how I would woo him with my tales of motherhood and suburban living.  And continued to be oblivious as I attempted to google every picture I could find of Anthony because we weren’t sitting close enough for me to see pores.

But the solidifier was during the encore.  Choice song: Give It Away.  Performance difficulty: I’m no rock God but I would give it a 9 out of 10 given the quick tempo.  Anthony’s choice singing stance: One-handed plank pose (if you’re not aware of yoga poses…lie down like you’re about to do a push-up, then lift one hand-up, then sing).

The strength it takes to do that…

Had I been 25 years younger, I’m pretty sure seeing that would have pushed me into puberty at an orgasmic speed.

So if you choose to become a regular customer of this blog, you have been warned.  You will learn things about Anthony Kiedis you never wanted to know.

Because I am pretty sure I am destined to be his most non-threatening, mini-van driving, stalker.

(Image Copyright – Sven Mandel 2016 / Wikipedia)

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4 thoughts on “Bossy’s Celebrity Crush

  1. Jokes on you – I already have MANY celebrity crushes…..Tom Hardy, Jamie Dornan (only in The Fall, not 50 Shades), current James Bond, the guy from that show, all comedians, Margot Robbie, Marky Mark’s body, the Swedish Chef (I love anyone who cooks for me) and Rob Lowe circa 1986.

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